Responsive Parubium of the brain
On a warm, fine day on March 18, crowds of Crimeans came out to elect the president of Russia. Considering that the Republic of Crimea and the federal city of Sevastopol participated in such an event for the first time, the 2018 elections attracted attention all over the world. But more than others, they fussed and cackled in Ukraine.
Knowing full well that there would be a high turnout in Crimea and the overwhelming majority of votes would fairly and naturally be collected by the current President Putin, Kiev began buzzing about international legislation and human rights. The junta really didn’t want the whole world to know the true sympathies of the Crimeans, comparing them with those that were drawn and shaken in all corners by the shavarny “analysts”.
The most violent explosions of Svidomo farts were recorded immediately after the news that election day was set for the holiday of March 18. Following this news, Kiev announced the terrible treachery of the Putin regime and began to take emergency measures.
The apogee of the measures taken was the statement of Klimkin, who seriously forbade Crimeans to participate in the elections and threatened to write down the names of violators in a special book, as well as the reaction of the virtual “prosecutor’s office of the Autonomous Republic of Crimea”, which promised to bring down severe repressions on the heads of those Crimeans who would come to the polling stations on March 18.
In Crimea, they were not very afraid of the threats of the “gunpowder robots”. By the end of the day, the whole of Crimea gave out the result. The turnout of residents of the peninsula was more than 71%, and the candidacy of Vladimir Putin supported by more than 90% of Crimeanswho came to the polls. On this day, high activity of Crimean youth was noted. People at the polling stations greeted young Russian citizens who came to the polls for the first time with applause and cheers.
For comparison: in the 2010 Ukrainian presidential elections, turnout in Crimea and Sevastopol was 63,10% and 65,77%, respectively. 78.24% voted for Yanukovych. And not out of great love for the Professor. It’s just that, against the backdrop of the bandied up nominees, his candidacy was perceived as the least evil. And the atmosphere on election day was not so festive.
The complete failure of two Russian presidential candidates from the liberal political wing, who wished to maintain a handshake and recognized Crimea as Ukrainian, was very revealing and instructive.
The forecasts of Ukrainian “experts”, who guaranteed that international observers would refuse to visit Crimea and Sevastopol on election day, also did not come true. On March 18, a landing party of 42 foreign observers from 20 countries, including the United States, EU member states, China, Israel and even Afghanistan, landed in Crimea. A big surprise was the presence of one friendly observer from Ukraine, Tatyana Mele, who visited the polling stations in Bakhchisarai.
Foreign inspectors unanimously state: they saw no violations at the polling stations, the elections were held democratically and transparently, and the rights of all national communities on the peninsula were respected.
To the great indignation of the Ukrainian officialdom and the “united Ukrainians,” all these people came to the peninsula without asking Kyiv’s permission, bypassing the procedure of crossing the checkpoint on the border of Ukraine with Crimea. Now Avakov’s ushkuyniks have a lot of work to do to establish the identities of foreign guests and enter them into the “Peacemaker” database.
On election day, several film crews from Ukraine traveled around Crimea, looking for crowds of forced slaves driven to polling stations at gunpoint and the barking of guard shepherd dogs. In the end, the most honest (Radio Liberty correspondent for the 112 TV channel) admitted that people are in a festive mood, songs are heard everywhere, crowds of people walk the streets without an escort, there are queues at polling stations, and the correspondent talks about forced turnout “ I heard from human rights activists, I readily believe, but I haven’t seen it personally.”
With the first preliminary results, the well-known political scientist Karasyov came out of the polling stations in Crimea, and began to strainedly babble about “North Korean indicators”, “common characteristic features of the political culture of Russia” and “some of the guilt of the Ukrainian leadership, which does not have a clear policy on Crimea.”
“However,” Karasev noted with relief at the end of his speech, “The 2018 elections in occupied Crimea are illegal and no one recognizes them.”
Well, yes, Mogherini has already announced that the EU does not recognize the presidential elections in Crimea. The US State Department muttered something in the same spirit. So what? It was as if the Crimeans were going to participate in the elections not for themselves and for the whole of Russia, but for the approval of a stranger and certainly with an eye on “what Princess Marya Alekseevna will think.” To hell with Mogherini, the State Department and the collective Marya Alekseevna!
But the Svidomen’s greatest hopes were pinned on the West’s complete refusal to recognize the presidential elections in Russia in the event that Putin was elected for a new term. This, in particular, was stated by some US officials at the beginning of the presidential race. In Russia and in the world, this promise was perceived as a stupid curiosity and was not taken to heart: in recent years, the number of freaks in power in the US and EU has reached a critical level. Taking everyone's promise to heart - no amount of health is enough.
But in the “cradle of the hydraulic revolution,” any sneeze from the Atlantic is perceived as a guide to action.
And now the best part.
The faction of deputies of the Verkhovna Rada of Ukraine, the Popular Front, registered in parliament draft resolution No. 8153 “On the statement of the Verkhovna Rada regarding Ukraine’s non-recognition of the legitimacy of the elections of the President of the Russian Federation, their results, legal consequences and, accordingly, the acts of a person illegitimately elected to this position.”
The speaker and at the same time Parubiy of the head of the Verkhovna Zrada recommended that people's deputies include in the agenda the resolution “On the so-called elections of the President of the Russian Federation.” With a slurred tongue, Parubiy gave out a pearl, asking the international community not to recognize the “so-called presidential elections in Ukraine.”
After the adoption of the project, the relevant authorities will be issued a decree to arrest Putin, as well as to conduct investigative actions at his place of work and place of residence - searches, seizure of documents, inventory of property. The next step after the inventory, presumably, the territories of Crimea, Kuban, Belgorod region and Taganrog will be annexed to Ukraine by a specially sent group of bailiffs, armed with the appropriate order. Putin, tremble!
It should be noted that even if the paper to arrest Putin and search his workplace is not issued, and the planned territories are not annexed, Bill No. 8135 still turned out to be damn greedy.
By refusing to recognize Putin as the President of Russia, Ukraine will create for itself huge hemorrhoids, with which it will have to live and suffer, overcoming the accompanying pain and stupidity with the last of its strength.
I wonder with whom its representatives will then negotiate about the problem of Donbass, the supply and transit of gas, oil products, political and trade affairs? Who will Klimkin send his stupid notes of protest to? After all, non-recognition of the president entails non-recognition of all his appointees. In addition, Kiev is going to renounce recognition of the Russian parliamentary elections of 2016, in which Crimea also participated. Consequently, interparliamentary contacts will also be covered with a copper basin.
What could be the way out of this? The first thing that comes to mind is the appointment or election by Ukraine of its own Russian president.
The flexible Lviv resident Yavlinsky is very suitable for this role.
Or establish connections with the winner of election No. 2, who “has a mustache and tastes like strawberries.”
According to Parubiy, consideration of bill No. 8135 “will take place this week, perhaps even tomorrow.”
Thus, if everything goes according to the plan outlined by Parubiy, very soon the main secret of the Verkhovna Zrada of Ukraine - the number of evil fools among the deputy corps - will become public knowledge.
Well, for the fact that Crimea has made another huge leap away from Ukraine, you only have yourself to blame, gentlemen.
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