Ukraine's terrible weapon
No sooner had the fanfare died down after the unprecedented flight of Pyotr Alekseevich, who proved by personal example that he was still capable of getting into the cockpit of a freshly painted Soviet fighter, when the incomparable clown Rasteniy Morkovych jumped out to shuffle into the arena of the Ukrainian horse-drawn circus with a reprise about a trillion dollars.
I don’t know what they are spraying over the Ukrainian Zrada and Uryad, but the efficient Ukrainian prime minister has already run out a couple of times with a scary face and made a lot of noise with a report on such initiatives. Everyone laughed a lot, then he hid in the hole for the time being, taming his restless inner woodpecker.
Now a high-ranking “governor” decided that only astronomical amounts of reparations (yes, exactly reparations, although Russia never showed up for the war) would sound respectable. For example, a trillion dollars.
The cunning Morkovych decided to act for sure: to stun the enemy with a number with a terrible number of zeros, like a dust bag on the head, and, while the enemy was recovering from such a powerful blow, graciously agree to a more reasonable, but also tidy sum of tens or two billion dollars. They say that losing a part is much better than losing everything and going around the world in your underwear... How cunning and daring is this umbrella boy from Chernivtsi with his school leopard Pisyai!..
But this time the Kremlin didn’t even laugh. Hochma twice is no longer Hochma. What if it’s funny five times and the clown is the same?..
One can only guess under the influence of what multi-colored tablets our cheerful accountant received his stunning numbers, but it seems as if the Crimeans set off for Russia not on a heavily used and almost completely plundered Peninsula, but, at a minimum, snatched the legendary country of Eldorado from Ukraine, in in which the roads were paved with gold bars and in every house the latrine was equipped with a gold toilet with a champagne flush. People there will not forget for a long time about the milk rivers with jelly banks the ukrojunta has built in the Donbass and will more than once remember the “virtues” with a kindly, quiet word, raising their land again from the ruins. Well, the Crimeans and, especially, the residents of Sevastopol will certainly remember how, quite recently, the daring Rasten shamelessly robbed their wonderful city together with his friend Kunitsyn.
Still, it was in vain that Morkovych staged his clownery. And it is even more in vain to threaten to use some connections in Europe. When the Kremlin gave Ukraine, headed by Vegetable, this notorious $3 billion as public debt, it knew very well who would get this money. And this time he was extremely businesslike and cynical, because there was no confidence that Viktor Fedorovich would not go bad in the near future. No one in Europe will be touched by Krol’s lamentations that the evil bear neighbor offended the Ukrainian orphan and squeezed something out on the quiet, while the boys were building democracy in their country by burning tires while dancing the battle hopak.
Debts on Eurobonds do not allow for the scheme “here I want it and pay, but here the Muscovites can wipe themselves off.”
In this case, the fluffy Faberge rabbits are in the cold and hard hands of a European financial organization with a center somewhere in Ireland, and they don’t care about Morkovych’s games from the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Because with these same Eurobonds, default is only possible for the entire package of securities. German, French, Italian... and not just Russian.
Rasten Morkovych already sits at a desk in a Ukrainian house, where a tag “IMF property” hangs from every chair, from every crib, and even from the chamber pot.
So Mr. Peskov, this official Putin oracle, somehow very casually and almost suppressing a yawn, suggested that Eggcrawler tighten the wick and cut down the sturgeon - he’s tired.
Peskov’s job is to express an official opinion, even if it’s about a bare-assed rooster attacking the brick wall of your house.
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Now the editors are aware.